An instructive work on ethics once written in the 15th century shared in regards to the disciplining of children — to never discipline a child out of anger. A parent may pretend to be angry to emphasize a point but to never actually do so in anger. That if a parent was angry then that parent should postpone disciplining until such time they were no longer actually angry.
I believe this is because anger is a consuming force that spreads indiscriminately by consuming gentleness in others and turning hearts into husks of callousness. And so by parenting in anger — the child will learn to create with anger and grow internally callous and hollow. A child will not be shepherded into a path of conscientious adulthood through commands and hostility — but rather by inspiring a culture of authentic care — and genuineness.
There are times in life when we must play a roles to achieve a desired outcome — but a growth oriented soul mustn’t lose themselves in the roles that they play. The ancient mystics imparted how our worldly experience is like a drama with a growth oriented choreography. But, that an aspirant will miss their mark and forget to grow if they identify too much with the dimming veils and roles they hide behind. It is therefore essential for any growth oriented person to dedicate their attention to routine mindfulness exercises to to get out out of the co-dependancy of social context and reinvigorate their innate states of loving kindness and genuineness — in this way the light of their soul will not be dimmed by the trappings of this temporal world.
Now, we have all appreciated dramas with excellent actors — and those actors work to perform their craft in ways that resonate authentic and inspire reflection. However — if an actor would be so overcome with a role that they could not tell the difference between what is the drama and what is real — then they are no longer acting at all — and require medical intervention. It is the same with interpersonal trappings of this world — you are here to play your roles while growing in genuineness and care. But — if you lose yourself in this world that world starts to own you in ways that you feed off hostility and conflict then you are not a healthy soul — and require greater intervention.